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Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Cooling Down

In the aftermath of last week's decision to not "love so hard," I feel weird.  How can you turn down your feelings for someone?  Unfortunately i'm not a faucet - things don't quite work that way.  

On some level, I feel at peace with our decision because I do believe it is what we both need. However, the prospect of actually implementing a cool down is scary.  What does it mean?  Does it mean that eventually we'll roll into friendship? Or less, since the majority of our relationship is emotional.  The stolen time we share is spent talking, eating and rarely sexing.  We kiss, we hug, we keep it relatively light and just enjoy each other's company.  

If I look at this objectively, we can still be good friends.  The dynamics will just change - not seeing each other as often or calling as much.  Not having such great expectations that are relationship-esque like expecting multiple calls a day, checking-in, dates, etc.  

So one part of me is welcoming of the prospect of having more time and space to focus on me and the things I've let go over the last few mos.  The other part of me is mourning the death of my relationship.  Well I guess only time will tell how this all plays out.  

Ever had to "cool down" your love for someone? Howdya do it?

1 comment:

Topaz said...

I'm cooling down my side relationship as we speak, and it ain't easy. But it's for the best at this moment, and that we both know it may resurface is a big turn on. We didn't blow up and have a big fight though, those dynamics may make it a little volatile, but it doesn't prevent any heating up in the future if you both end up in a place where you can enjoy each other without falling into the friend trap.